Wow, sometimes an album really surprises you. I wasn't expecting much from this British quartet, but this is some good thrash. Heavily rooted in NWOBHM, it's a bit of a throwback but this is some down and dirty, riff-crazy stuff with some excellent, powerful, melodic vocals over top. And really, that's it -- vocalist Danny Foxx is so likeable in his role that the rest of the band could be playing some pretty generic stuff and it may receive a passing grade. Luckily though, the instrumentation is up to snuff, so this is a very enjoyable experience. Also, with song titles like "Deathstiny"... I mean, come on. 1. Metalyzed 2. Gor 3. N.Z.F.E.D.K. 4. Lazarus 5. Red, Raw and Bleeding 6. Stormer 7. Taras Bulba 8. Deathstiny 9. The Third Wish 10. Death Heavy Score: 7.5/10
At War were pretty standard fare for a 1986 thrash band. They were the thrashing everyman -- hard-working, full of attitude and enthusiasm, but a little short on originality and songwriting acumen. The album starts off well enough with the title track, then lulls for a couple songs before breaking into "Rapechase", a song that would be controversial if anyone ever heard it. It also sounds a lot like Motorhead which is funny since the next song is a Motorhead cover. At War do a great job on "The Hammer", which is a good thing but it kind of hurts their cause. It's obvious that "The Hammer" is head-and-shoulders a better song than any of the originals here and it kind of just makes me want to go listen to Motorhead. 1. Ordered to Kill 2. Dawn of Death 3. Capitulation 4. Rapechase 5. The Hammer 6. Mortally Wounded 7. Ilsa (She-Wolf of the S.S.) 8. Eat Lead Score: 4.5/10
With a wicked name like Anvil Bitch, you would hope that they'd be more than some one album, flash in the pan. You would hope that they could do more than recycle Metallica riffs buried under generic thrash vocals with below average production values. Yet that's exactly what Anvil Bitch did. It's not totally fucking awful, but at this point, with more and more quality bands surfacing, 'not awful' ain't good enough. Throw Rise To Offend in the "Only Thrash Die-Hard Idiots Like Gord Need To Hear This" bin. Truly unremarkable. 1. Rise to Offend 2. Lie Through your Teeth 3. Vengeance of the Sword 4. Life After Death 5. Time to Die 6. Argue With a Sick Mind 7. Maggot Infestation 8. Neckbreaker 9. Arsenic & Cyanide 10. Fight For Your Life 11. Shark Attack 12. Anvil Bitch Score: 2/10
When you come across an album that looks as ridiculous as this one does, your first thought is that it will be hilariously awful. With song titles like "Essence of Sperm" and "A.N.A.L. Spices", how could this be anything but a riot? Suprisingly though, once you get past the pretty shitty production, The Severed Erection is a pretty competent thrash album. The first two tracks, "Ejaculator" and the title track are good examples of well written thrash songs, as long as you can ignore the juvenile lyrics. The guitar playing is excellent throughout, leading one to wonder if these Aussies could have flown higher if they had decided to create a more intelligent image for themselves. There are far worse bands who had multiple releases in the 80's than Massive Appendage, yet because of their idiotic choice of a band name and album cover very few people outside of Sydney probably ever heard this album until the internet age. Let me leave you with this: The chorus of the song "Massive Appendage" goes something like this, from what I can make out, "Massive cocks flying through the atmosphere. Oh my god they shot a load in his ear." Seriously. I could be hearing it wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's what they're saying. 1. War Zone 2. Ejaculator 3. The Severed Erection 4. A.N.A.L. Spices 5. Massive Appendage 6. Constable Nosey Parker 7. What's Happening to the World 8. Auntie Claire 9. Essence of Sperm 10. Interlude 11. Get Fucked Score: 5/10
